When motivation wanes, tend your rows
Waning motivation is something we all can relate to. It is the universal factor in giving up or backing away from something we’ve started.
Have you ever?
- Started a project with gusto and then eventually abandoned it
- Experienced resentment toward a process that once gave you joy
- Felt like a failure for not being able to see something through
- Realized that you haven’t done ______ in a long time, but can’t remember why you stopped
- Wondered why you can’t stick with a plan long enough to see results
Every year when spring is approaching I get very excited to garden. As soon as I have a sunny day to tease me I start planning, nerding out over seed selections and making planting diagrams. My motivation climbs until the seeds are in the ground, and it holds until I start harvesting.
Then my motivation wanes. Slowly but surely I get sick of eating the same beans or going out to weed. Instead of a lovely green garden it starts to look more like the wild scraggly stuff that grows on the sides of highway on-ramps. I look out my window and vow to do something about it. It can feel like such a chore depending on my mood.
By mid-fall I might have completely lost initiative to clean it up or get it prepped for the winter. This year I left it ugly and abandoned, and I feel bad about it. I gave up. I didn’t have what it takes to finish something. Spring Me gets pissed that I let oregano go to seed everywhere, and that I didn’t mulch with wet leaves or compost properly.
Does it matter?
Everybody needs to feel accomplished. Some are better at brushing off the loss of things that no longer interest them. If I continued everything I ever started, stuck with every dream, I could be married to Michael Jackson (or Michael J Fox) and still adding garbage pail kids to my pegacorn sticker album.
Sometimes the effort is better spent on new projects, and other times getting back on track makes more sense. Either way, decide to do something. Letting unfinished business fester contributes to stress and inhibits progress.
What to do about waning motivation?
Get over it and move on
If you want to move on to another project you should close the door on the thing you are done with. This doesn’t mean you can’t change your mind later and reopen it, it just means you aren’t letting the worry of something in limbo bug you. Freeing up time, mental space, energy, and initiative gives strength to what you choose to take on next.
Hit the pause button
Alternatively, you can get to a good stopping point that allows you to pick back up where you left off when the timing is better. Just make sure this dormant state low maintenance, or you may up resenting it.
Find a win
If you haven’t been seeing results for your efforts, and this makes you want to give up, plan to focus on something that will give you a psychological boost for the time being. This can be “low hanging fruit”, or something that pleases the senses and gives you a feeling of accomplishment. Playing the long game can seem toooo long.
Examples include:
- Pick something that will give you a visual reminder of your goal: this can be something like a tracker or inspiration board, or something tangible you’ve actually completed.
- Plan a social event or celebration surrounding your hard work
- Pick something you’ve been looking forward to and attach it to completing a phase of work (like, “we will finish paying off our credit card bill before we start summer break”)
Adjust your reward
When dealing with a big project or goal, focus on an angle that gives you the most bang for your buck. The thing that gave you impetus yesterday won’t necessarily be your favorite today, so let your rewards shift as needed.
When I first started running, my goal was to lower my blood sugar. Although this is still important to me, in the short term I find myself looking forward to the way I’ll feel after running, as well as getting to listen to podcasts uninterrupted. My previous post, 13 Tips for Getting Over the Hump of the Exercise Hill, tells more about finding wins and rewards.
Remind yourself why and immerse yourself in it
Even the best things in life can go stale or become forgotten. Regular maintenance and work are required to keep us going in every way, even when we’re having fun. Consciously showing yourself what your goals mean to you and revisiting your initial motivations and feelings can spark positive mojo.
Getting excited again can be as simple as:
- Reminiscing about falling in love with the idea that started your journey
- Seeking more information on how to do more, better
- Rehashing your game plan—get organized about your next steps
- Connecting with others who support you and can offer insight
Work in pieces
Big projects are daunting. When it feels too overwhelming, mini goals are needed. Set milestones to complete and put everyday things on your to-do lists that support reaching them.
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither are six pack abs
Outsource
Grunt work can ruin the fun of getting what you want, so con someone else into doing the heavy lifting for you. Also, paying someone to do things necessary to your goal (that you don’t have the motivation, knowledge, or time to do) can be just what you need to make progress.
Examples include:
- Hiring a personal trainer to customize your workouts
- Taking a class to learn something you’ve always wanted to do
- Finding childcare, or hiring an assistant at work, so you can get uninterrupted time to focus on a project
- Forcing your kids to do the loathed garden chores aforementioned in this article
Looking ahead
The fear of losing motivation later can stop us from starting at all. Having a plan in place for the ebb and flow of motivation can help keep you from giving up, or can help you let go without regrets. Again, whatever you do, do something!