What Reminds You of Your Real Goals?
I often lose sight of what I really want. It is easy to get caught up in things that don’t really matter, distractions and avoidances that help dilute the sting of failure when trying to reach a goal. Sometimes those coping mechanisms are in direct opposition to my true desires.
I can get depressed or bored thinking about my health problems and it makes me want a Monte Cristo sandwich or something fried dipped in ranch dressing. It is no secret that I have overeating tendencies and I also have what I like to refer to as “blood sugar issues”. Hyperglycemia can lead to so many poor outcomes. I am fully aware of how losing one’s eyesight, kidneys, or legs can be devastating to quality of life. I have personally wrapped the stumps of newly amputated legs of diabetic patients. And then watched the patients call their families and friends to sneak them thick stacks of tortillas or a 2 liter of cola. Even when loss is fresh, and literally painful, old habits die hard.
I have considered tattooing the likeness of my kidney or heart on my arm as a reminder that what I eat might take those things from me someday. It is damn hard to keep motivation going, to keep goals and realities at the forefront of my thoughts, intentions, and actions. Ultimately it is my desire to live a long and healthy life. To spend as much time as possible with people I love doing things I enjoy. In order to do those things I need my organs and my ability to walk, to see. So why can’t I be honest with myself when I binge eat a cake, that I am sorta killing myself in shortened life or functionality? The ideal would be to preserve my health, not squander it foolishly.